I am a game designer.

“What I most want to convey to you is that slacking is really quite different from other forms of inactivity. Your true and authentic slacker is not like a dosser, or a shirker, or a truant of any description. Indeed slackers are often surprisingly productive people. The reason for this is that the ‘slack’ itself, the actual head of inertia that the slacker builds up whilst doing nothing, is to the psyche as the stretched rubber of a bungee is to the bungee jumper.

When the slacker reaches the very bottom of this descent into inactivity, he finds himself with an unconscionable amount of energy which has to be dispersed as quickly as possible. This is the only explanation I can come up with of how I have managed to do anything at all in my life.”

“In 2002, China had 171 cities with more than a million people in them — how many can you name?”

“The explanation of left-handedness is simple. I understand that it is to do with the dominance of one of the hemispheres of the brain. The left hemisphere controls the body's right side, and the right hemisphere controls the left side. That means that only left-handed people are truly in their right minds.”